Oh hello darling and welcome back to Adjustment month. All month long I will delve into the topics that cause issues in all our lives, and show you ways to adjust this behaviour and bring some positive outcomes to all our lives. Today I want to delve into the emotional attainment that I put on my own spending.
I am not sure how many of you will relate to this, but I know I am not alone in the way I feel about buying things. Consumption is part of being human, and there are scientific studies that prove that new things make us happy. Yet for me, it goes a little deeper, I really feel that the next purchase will be the thing that WILL CHANGE MY LIFE.
How silly does that sound?
I have to be honest seeing it written down, it is laughable. When my fingers linger over the buy now button this is part of the justification process I employ. This is highly prevalent in more expensive purchases I cannot justify.
A few weeks ago this manifested itself in the form of a pair of leather trousers, that were £200. That's right reader, £100 a leg!
I work for myself, and I am financially stable (ish), but there is no way I can piss away that much money for one thing without serious reason. Last year I bought a faux leather pair, and I do wear them quite a bit, they still fit and are in perfect condition, and I love them, so I don't need a replacement.
However, as I circled back to the leather trousers day after day, I began to tell myself that those leather trousers would elevate so many of my looks. They would make me look more put together, people would take me more seriously. In short, the leather trousers WOULD CHANGE MY LIFE. So on a whim, I bought them.
The thing is, after that initial rush of endorphins when I bought them, I began to feel sick. The problem is, the minute something is in my possession (providing it fits) I will not return it. So pressing buy now typically locks me into that purchase. Risky wealth management for a freelance writer.
They arrived, and apart from the texture and smell, they were identical to my faux leather trousers. I tried them on, and yes the material felt soft, but when they got over my hips, they did not do up and were tight on my bum. The leather trousers taught me a lesson, and have begun to shake me out of my behavior.
They looked SHIT reader, and you do not know the RELIEF I felt in that moment, that I could send them back for a FULL refund. It showed me that no item can ever really change my life. Using this as a justification to spend money I should be saving is crap because it is harmful to me; I am taking away from my financial stability and the purchase makes me feel guilty too, so I am poorer and sad.
How stupid is that?
This has been a bitter pill to swallow, but it is a very necessary one! So if you are an emotional spender like I am, take note, we have to stop assuming things will change our lives.
Plot twist; they WON'T.
We have to change our lives ourselves, and the things in our life can offer enrichment, but not cause actual change! Small shifts in the way we think and make decisions will cause big changes in our happiness and outlook on life, and this is the principle role of Adjustment Month.
Join me next week when Adjustment month continues, where we will look at our schedules and just how busy we really are.
Shot by Rachel Pechey
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